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A biblical guide to working with difficult people

Blessed are the peacemakers, for they will be called children of God. (Matthew 5:9)

In his excellent book The Peacemaker (which was hugely influential in my writing of this series), author Ken Sande defines conflict as “a difference in opinion or purpose that frustrates someone’s goals or desires.”

With that definition as our guide, it’s easy to see that “conflict” is everywhere in our work. But the command to make peace is everywhere in God’s Word. 

After declaring “Blessed are the peacemakers,” Jesus went on to dedicate huge portions of the Sermon on the Mount to the art of resolving conflict (see Matthew 5:21-26, 38-41, 43-48, 6:14, and 7:1-5). Commenting on that sermon, pastor Tony Merida says, “Clearly being a peacemaker is a big deal to Jesus!”

It was also a big deal to Jesus’s followers. As Ken Sande points out, “every Epistle in the New Testament contains a command to live at peace with one...

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5 biblical truths about work on the New Earth

work in heaven Oct 14, 2024

They will see his face, and his name will be on their foreheads….And they will reign for ever and ever. (Revelation 22:4-5)

Today concludes our series exploring 5 biblical truths about work on the New Earth. Here they are again:

  • Truth #1: We who are in Christ will delight in our work for eternity.
  • Truth #2: We will be rewarded with varying degrees of responsibility based on how we live and work today.
  • Truth #3: We can expect some continuity between our work now and our work on the New Earth. 
  • Truth #4: We will have unlimited time to do the work we want to do for God’s glory.
  • Truth #5: We will reign with Christ intimately forever and ever.

I saved the best truth for last. Because it is that foundational truth—that we will finally be with God fully—that makes all the others so wonderful.

But read Revelation 22:5 again. We won’t just be with God. We will work and reign with him, which is exactly what he intended from the beginning (see Genesis...

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Got more ideas than time? This truth can change your life.

work in heaven Oct 07, 2024

No longer will there be any curse. The throne of God and of the Lamb will be in the city, and his servants will serve him…And they will reign for ever and ever. (Revelation 22:3,5)

There are dozens of jobs I would love to try: write a musical, be a travel planner, design a bookstore, serve as personal photographer to a president or dignitary. The list goes on and on. 

Why don’t I give one of these careers a shot? Because loving my neighbor through my work requires the pursuit of excellence in my work. And the pursuit of excellence requires loads of focus and time.

You simply can’t “do it all” if you want to do your most exceptional work for the glory of God and the good of others. But you can in the life to come! 

That brings me to the fourth of five biblical truths about work on the New Earth we’re exploring in this series: We will have unlimited time to do the work we want to do for God’s glory.

Psalm 37:4 says this: “Take...

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Walt Disney may have hurried less if he knew this biblical truth

work in heaven Sep 30, 2024

Blessed are the dead who die in the Lord from now on…for their deeds will follow them. (Revelation 14:13)

A fortune teller once told Walt Disney that he would die on his birthday before he turned thirty-five. As Disney biographer Bob Thomas explains, “the prediction had a profound effect on him…he seemed to be in a race against time to accomplish all the work he wanted to do.” 

Can you relate to Walt Disney? Of feeling like time is speeding up and the drumbeat of hurry only seems to be growing louder? 

I used to feel that burden far more than I do today. What has God used to free me? Biblical truths about work on the New Earth in general and this one in particular: We can expect some continuity between our work now and our work on the New Earth. 

What kinds of continuity? At least these two. 

First, there will be some continuity in what we work with as Isaiah 60 promises that some of the best cultural goods from this life will...

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Where do you see yourself in 5 million years? Seriously…

work in heaven Sep 23, 2024

“Well done, my good servant!” his master replied. “Because you have been trustworthy in a very small matter, take charge of ten cities.” (Luke 19:17)

We’re in a series exploring 5 biblical truths about work on the New Earth. Today’s passage hints at the second: We will be rewarded with varying degrees of responsibility based on how we live and work today.

Now, if this sounds new to you, it's not your fault. Many churches never talk about eternal rewards. But Jesus did constantly. And one of the many rewards he promised is increased job responsibilities on the New Earth. 

This is one of the lessons of Jesus’s parable of the minas (see Luke 19:11-27), which is similar to but distinct from the parable of the talents. The parable features a master (who represents Jesus) who asks a few servants to steward his minas (a form of money) while he goes on a journey. Upon his return, the master turns to the servants who have faithfully stewarded...

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My favorite poem will cure any “case of the Mondays”

work in heaven Sep 16, 2024

See, I will create new heavens and a new earth….my chosen ones will long enjoy the work of their hands. They will not labor in vain. (Isaiah 65:17, 22-23)

I talk a lot about the work God’s Word promises we will do for eternity. But I know this is a wild and new idea for many. If that’s you, let me bring you up to speed in three bullets:

  • Nobody will spend eternity “in heaven.” God promises to bring heaven to earth and to dwell with us here forever (see Revelation 21:1-5).
  • While the present heaven is marked by rest (see Revelation 14:13), the New Earth is marked by active service and worship (see Revelation 22:3-5).
  • We will worship God not just by singing but by long enjoying the work of our hands (see Isaiah 65:17-23).

With those foundational truths under our feet, I’ll use the rest of this series to share 5 biblical truths about the nature of work on the New Earth. The first is seen clearly in today’s passage: We who are in Christ will...

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How to be content while striving for the next thing

double-sided wisdom Sep 09, 2024

Be content with what you have, because God has said, “Never will I leave you; never will I forsake you.” (Hebrews 13:5)

Today concludes our series exploring couplets of biblical truths that God calls us to hold in tension. Here’s our final piece of double-sided wisdom: Desire Good Things AND Be Content in All Things.

Many Christians don’t feel permission to desire. But Scripture gives it to us repeatedly! In Matthew 7:7-11, Jesus encouraged his followers to “ask” for “good gifts.” And Psalm 37:4 urges us to "take delight in the Lord, and he will give you the desires of your heart." 

So, while Scripture condemns fleshly desires (see Galatians 5:16-17), it clearly commends good and God-honoring desires like landing a promotion so you can serve more people or earning more income so you can give more generously.

But the flip side of this double-sided wisdom is to “be content with what you have” (see Hebrews 13:5). So, God...

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3 ways to exude confidence AND humility at work today

double-sided wisdom Sep 02, 2024

Such confidence we have through Christ before God. Not that we are competent in ourselves to claim anything for ourselves, but our competence comes from God. (2 Corinthians 3:4-5)

We’re in a series exploring five pieces of “double-sided wisdom” we see throughout God’s Word. Today we come to the paradoxical couplet of biblical charges to Be Confident AND Stay Humble.

The call to confidence is found in passages like 2 Timothy 1:7 which says that “the Spirit God gave us does not make us timid, but gives us power.” 

But you can hear the flip side of this double-sided wisdom—the call to humility—in passages like Ephesians 4:2: “Be completely humble and gentle.”

How do we reconcile these two seemingly conflicting commands? By recognizing that the source of our confidence is the Lord! That’s what Paul is telling us in today’s passage. His confidence in his work was not sourced in what he thought of himself or what...

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Jesus would likely push back against “self-care” in this important way…

double-sided wisdom Aug 26, 2024

…because so many people were coming and going that [the apostles] did not even have a chance to eat, [Jesus] said to them, “Come with me by yourselves to a quiet place and get some rest. (Mark 6:31-32)

Job 11:6 says that, “True wisdom has two sides.” Which is why we’re exploring five pieces of “double-sided wisdom” in this series—couplets of paradoxical truths that God calls us to hold in tension. Here’s today’s: Enjoy Self-Care AND Embrace Self-Sacrifice.

We see Jesus modeling the first side of this double-sided wisdom throughout the gospels as he “often withdrew to lonely places” for some peace, quiet, and prayer (Luke 5:16). And in today’s passage, we see Jesus offering self-care to his followers (see Mark 6:31-32).

And yet, the dominant theme of Jesus’s life was not self-care but self-sacrifice, the flip side of this double-sided wisdom. For “the Son of Man did not come to be served, but...

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3 practices for planning for tomorrow without worrying about tomorrow

double-sided wisdom Aug 19, 2024

Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own. (Matthew 6:34)

We’re in a series exploring five pieces of “double-sided wisdom” we see in Scripture. Today we come to the couplet of biblical commands to Plan for Tomorrow AND Focus on Today.

The virtues of the first side of this double-sided wisdom can be seen in Proverbs 21:5: “The plans of the diligent lead to profit as surely as haste leads to poverty.” Jesus echoed this idea in Luke 14:28-30 where he assumes that a good worker will “first sit down and estimate the cost” before “building a tower.”

In these passages and others, we see that it is wise to plan for the future. But the flip side of this double-sided wisdom is tonot worry about tomorrow” and focus on today (see Matthew 6:34).

So, how can we both plan for tomorrow and stay focused on today? Here are three practices that work for me.

#1:...

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